


Watching You, Watching Me

by Blondjjong



Category: EXO (Band), SHINee, SuperM (Korea Band)
Genre: M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-07
Updated: 2019-02-07
Packaged: 2019-10-24 01:44:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17695244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blondjjong/pseuds/Blondjjong
Summary: He lets the tension hang between them because he's happy to be here at all.





	Watching You, Watching Me

**Author's Note:**

> This could be considered a follow-up to Misstep cause I just cant leave angsty boys alone to suffer,,,

Somewhere along the way they lost sight of one another. Jongin’s not sure when exactly they stopped being on the same page. Truthfully, lately he’s been wondering if they were ever reading the same story at all. All signs point to otherwise.   
  
Jongin doesn’t think he’ll ever forget the last time they were like this; it was the last as well as the first. The parallels are startling, upsetting the long since numbed ache in his chest. They’re currently sat on Taemin’s couch just like that very first night nearly a year ago, their shoulders pressed close without mind for personal space. Taemin has slender legs draped over Jongin’s lap, his back settled comfortably against the arm of the couch, body nestled into the crook of it. Somewhere along the way Jongin’s fingers have made their way up under the hem of Taemin’s sleep pants, stroking gentle absent minded patterns over the smooth skin of his shin. The atmosphere comfortable and familiar as they watched one episode, after another play on the television mounted on the living room wall.    


Jongin isn’t watching anymore though, his eyes hooded in a manner that mimics Taemin’s own. He’s simply gazing, observing Taemin’s existence in such close proximity of his own. Jongin would be bold faced lying if he said he didn’t miss this, or that he didn’t constantly question his own resolve in the months leading up to this very moment, while he tried to move on. It was easier though back when Jongin thought he’d misread the situation altogether. When the harsh jagged sting of rejection was spurring him forwards to let go. That was before, in one emotionally charged conversation, Taemin had destroyed everything Jongin had come to believe. Upturned everything he’d thought true since the night Jongin had finally given in to the ages old tension between them, and pressed all too gently, his lips to Taemin’s own.   
  
Jongin knows now, understands in near full the internal struggle Taemin had been shoved into the moment Jongin had stepped over that deeply drawn and long held line. The self turmoil Taemin had needed to come to terms with, before he could ever even attempt to return the unconditional love Jongin shone upon him. It was a month too late when the words finally came, when Taemin’s confession was laid bare in front of Jongin. Exposed. Leave it to Jongin’s most treasured to flip Jongin’s world on his head; only fair he figured, seeing as he’d done just that to Taemin only months before.  
  
There’s only so much time these things run for though. There’s only so long they can do this aching push and pull, before the foundation they’ve both built their love for one another upon crumbles under the stress. It’s a thought that flits across Jongin’s mind in the most vulnerable of moments, just how long they’ve got left. If they’ll ever really get a chance at all.   
  
Taemin’s looking at him in a way that completely foreign to Jongin. It’s heavy, his eyes dark, and his lips parted ever so slightly. His face intense with bared emotion in a way that's uncharacteristic to Taemin. It has Jongin’s pulse fluttering under his skin, his hands shaking with nerves. Like north and south magnets they’re forever pulling back into one another, and in the same way that Jongin can pick Taemin out in the densest crowd, Jongin can read the older’s body language as if he’d written the manual.    
  
But he knows better.   
  
Jongin knows nothing is going to come of this. He’s been here before. It’s not the first time since Taemin’s returned confession that this tension has woven tight between them, hanging in the air so heavy you could touch it. It’ll pass though, it always does. Despite that certainty, Jongin can’t help but long for Taemin to close the gap, to  _ just for once _ take what he wants. Jongin is resolved though; he’s more than happy to have salvaged the most important friendship, most important relationship in his life. And this is okay. He’s fine with this, the way things are coming natural after months of discomfort between them. He’s grateful to have Taemin in his life again and no amount of longing gazes would bring Jongin to do, or even genuinely will something that could jeopardize that. Jongin is happy, he’s content to have his best friend back and that’s truthfully the end of it.   
  
But then Taemin is leaning in.


End file.
